A leader is best when people barely know they exist, when the work is done, the aim fulfilled, they will say: we did it ourselves.

‍Lao Tzu

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I’ve found it useful to distinguish between two forms of leading: Hero-ing and Hosting.

Hero-ing is when you put yourself at the centre. “I have the answers.” “I need to fix it.” “It’s about what I do that will make the difference.” The focus is on you. It’s ego-centric. 

You’ll probably be familiar with that form of leading. If you look around, you’ll see it everywhere. It’s pervasive in our culture. And if you’re honest with yourself, you’ve probably worn the hero cape yourself.

Hosting is different. 

Hosting is where you put others at the centre. “They have the answers.” “My role is to create the conditions.” “It’s about how they interact that will make the difference.” The focus is on the ecosystem of the people you’re working with. It’s eco-centric. 

Hosting is rarer. Yet it’s exponentially more powerful when you’re working with complexity. When leadership feels like you’re walking through the fog, navigating complexity is better served by feeling our way together, testing and learning as we go.

One of the big reasons hero-ing dominates hosting is because of the stories we tell ourselves. That the leader is the one who has the answers that others don’t. They’re the leader because they’re smarter, wiser, better than others. So let them lead the way.

That’s disempowering. If we want to feel empowered, change the story.

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Learning Host Leadership

If you want to learn how to be a host leader, listen to great podcast hosts. As I was exploring how to create my own podcast, my coach Penny Terry got me to analyse several other podcasts. Here’s what I learned:

A podcast host’s job is to bring out the best in their guests. 

A podcast host does this by:

• Setting a clear intent for the conversation at the start
• Crafting good questions that encourage the guest to open up and engage
• Shutting up and listening to learn, letting the guest do most of the talking
• Guiding the conversation and keeping it on track
• Bringing it to a close when the time is right.

A leader’s job is to bring out the best in their people. I reckon by following the guidelines above, a great host leader can create outcomes where the people will say “we did it ourselves.”

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For more like this, check out:

‍Five Ideas for Leading Wisely

‍Leadership is Walking Through the Fog

‍Create the Conditions

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